guest blogger: dating do’s and don’t's – a man’s perspective

You may remember two weeks ago when I took it upon myself to offer the definitive list of dating do’s and don’t's.  As with any definitive list, nearly every reader had his or her own opinion about the advice I was offering. Some people agreed, some didn’t, and some took exception to the whole enterprise.

One such person pointed out that all the advice was directed at men. While I countered that it was because men need way more help in the dating world than women do, my friend did have a point, and since we’re all about equal opportunities here at Miss Right Now, I told him if he wanted to write his own dating tips for women, I’d be happy to publish it. So we now welcome Miss Right Now’s first-ever guest blogger (who wishes to remain anonymous) with his dating do’s and don’t's.

-Don’t be late for your first or second dates. If you’re going to be late, give us a heads up. It’d be great if you let us know you were running late before we are sitting at the bar/table/corner waiting 10 minutes for you.

-Show up in decent form to first date. Yes, I’m excited to meet you for the first time. I can, however, wait a bit so that you can go home after work to get ready. I really don’t care to meet you for the first time in your waitress/lawyer outfit/school spirit [teacher] clothes. You’ll either be smelling like food, horribly overdressed, or looking like a wannabe cheerleader.

-Have a phone conversation prior to meeting. Don’t give me the line, “‘I’m not into talking on the phone.” You don’t like it? Fine. Do it at least before meeting. What if I were some creepster? Or you sounded oddly like a man? Anyways, I usually would try to ask for the first date on the phone call.

-On the date? Bring something to talk about. I’ll come prepared to to talk. It’s not a version of 20 questions me to you [or vice versa], and not a job interview. Also, don’t start bringing randoms around you into the conversation.  I’m around to learn about you, not about the [probable] toolbags next to us.

-I’m going to pay on the first date. It’s a nice gesture if you offer half [wouldn't take you up on it], the tip [I might allow that], or a round of drinks after [definitely allow]. If by the third date you haven’t paid for anything but a round of happy hour Coors Lights, I’m going to think you are one of those girls who always expects her man to pay. Fail.

-Be clear if you’re interested in hanging again. Don’t go on a date with me, appear to have a great time, text or call a bit after, and then just disappear. You either want to see me again or you don’t. You know this before we’re even done with the first date. I get it. I have to chase you a bit. I’m probably the one who initially messeged you and asked you out, but give me a little something to work with. I’m not a mind reader, and I don’t like to make assumptions.

-Don’t push. It’s ok to wonder where things are headed, or if the other person is interested, etc., but it’s a fine balance. If you ask too early, you may seem like you’re coming on too strong. And be aware that if you ask, you may not like the answer.

-Don’t invade my space. You like me? Nice. I like you too. I’m probably looking forward to cute little messages, chats on the phone, and seeing you in person. You want to cook me dinner? Awesome. I love food. You want to cook me dinner, tell me about your whole life like I’m you’re husband, bring items to keep at my place for when you stay over…and it’s only the 3rd or 4th date? That’s a good way to get dropped, and fast. Seriously. This has got to be the biggest fail. I’m sure some people are in to it. I want to take my time in getting to know you before your makeup makes a home on my sink.

-I’m not going to meet your parents the first month I know you. So don’t invite me to your Christmas party and then let me know your parents and every friend you have is going to be there.